This is dedicated to friendS, who questioned my lack of little people, babies.
If this topic of writing bores you, blame them.
My one and only Junior High friend in contact, also called me and after few news changing, she forced me to have a baby. FORCE. She didn’t listen to any reasoning o mine. She is considered lucky that I gave any. Because since sometime ago, I adopted Silence Is Golden, as I learned that trying to reason only would make me fall into deeper trap.
When I was in Jakarta, I was fooled once. My brother’s father in law, I happened to walk through him, and as good gesture, exchange words. Supposedly it was only a hello and goodbye, there was no way that The Big Question could come out.
“Hi, Om.” The conversation should end here.
“Aping! In Jakarta for few days?”
“Yes – “
“Why haven’t you have babies yet?”
“Hah? Ugh…, we’re not ready.” The conversation should end here.
“Why? No such thing. You have to ….., bla… remember…bla…then…bla….age…blablablablabalala…..almost thirty…...blabalabalablabalabalbala…...gludug gludug..”
See? Reasoning your head.
So, when we were in the wedding dinner. I tried not to stand on the same spot, but eventually I was in the guest reception table for way too long at one moment.
“Aping!”
When I turned around, my second and third aunt shoot, “What’s wrong with your mind that you decide not to have baby yet?”
I left them on spot, rude indeed, but I swear, I smiled before I left. I didn’t even know why I left, my reflexes tried to escape, I guess.
My first aunt used another approach. She grabbed my hand, looked at me straight in the eye, and in the Hi, I’m a FBI agent, I’ve seen UFO and Yeti tone, she said, “Trust me. You really should bla bla…"
Okay, forget about responsibility, financial, education and all those reasons. I try extreme ones this time. I read it somewhere and let me try to rephrase it and add a few spices on my own.
There is nothing free and safe again in this world. I have to spend my life working, and destroy my health, and use the money I earn to restore it. I live between Mass Weapon Destruction, suicide bombers, beheaded hostages, pedophiles priests, bird flu, mad cow, Aids, ebola and war. I pay for food, water, bed, security and the only thing I can have for free, air, is polluted. I used to enjoy cartoons as kid, now cartoons make people kill each other.
Tell me, should I bring another person to this crazy world?
Hm?
Hm?
Course I will. But not now. So shut up. ; p
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Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for
sex.
- Bill Maher
Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
- W.C. Fields
The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
- Clarence Darrow
The trouble with children is that they're not returnable.
- Quentin Crisp.
Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin.
- Tim Vine
I love to go to the playground and watch the children jumping up and down. They don't know I'm firing blanks.
- Emo Philips
