Ad satu jenis kategori makhluk yang ampe sekarang gua belom terbiasa, sebenarnya dua, tapi biasanya orangnya sama. The Toucher and the Mr/Mrs Too Close. Udah lama gua mengenali ciri orang ini, terkadang mereka muncul dari sejak jama dahulu kala, terkadang mereka baru nongol setelah kenal lebih dekat.
The toucher itu jenis orang yang suka sekali memegang-megang. Bukan megang apa-apan yang gak sopan, ya kalo megang yang gak sopan mungkin ada alas an buat ditendang, digaplok, dikurung, beres kali. Tapi Toucher atau Si Tukang Colek ini yang suka nyentuh2, kilik2, colek2, segala jenis yang nyebelin! Paling gak tahan kalo ngobrol2 ditoel2 atau tau2 ditoel, arghhhh!! Ngapaen seeeh!?? Grrr…! Pokoknya gua gak ngerti apa perlunya dan gua sebal kalo harus berhadapan dengan orang demikian, terutama bila terjebak di keadaan yang gak memungkinkan gue untuk kabur, seperti dikelas, di meeting, makan..
Gue juga suka kaget kalo orang ngomong dengan jarak super dekat, yang tau2 mukanya langsung ditempelin deket ke muka elo. Wtf.. kalo budeg sih mungkin, tapi tetap aja..yang lebih serem yang nyodorin mukanya dari jauh dengan gerakan cepat. Pas ngajak ngobrol orang begini, rasanya seperti kejatuhan meteor, kalo belom tau. Gua pernah lagi duduk, ada rekan kerja nanyain soal computer. Gua jawab, ternyata gak jelas, jadinya tulang punggungnya seakan-akan tiba-tiba rusak, mukanya ke-katalput sampai tinggal beberapa inci dari muka gua dan nanyain lagi. Whoaaa!! Ibu-ibu sinting. Setidaknya kao udah tau gue bisa ancang2, begitu ngeliat tulang punggung udah mulai lentur, gua langsung ber paling ke arah laen atau merem. Yang lebih gak bisa ditebak adalah yang langsung duduk disebelah dan nyengir kuda tanpa disadari., giliran nengok..whoaaa, kutu kumpret! Trus pas ngejelasin sesuatu atau kerjaan, orang kudu skoliosis (p.s tulang punggung melenggak lenggok) karena pada dasarnya tuh orang bener2 udah ambil space pribadi. Ironinya, mereka itu jago ‘menjaga jarak’, jadi kalo loe menjauh, mereka bisa konsisten., jarak 30 senti itu 30 senti, segimanapun punggung loe udah rasanya mau putus karena berbelok ke kiri. Ugh..jelas kan maksud gua?
Entah kenapa, sepertinya temen2yang akhirnya menjadi teman beneran mayoritas bukan Pencolek atau Peng-terlalu dekat. Mungkin karena gua cenderung menghindari mereka, mungkin karena urat syaraf gue pendek dan bête banget kalo dicolek-colek. Ada juga teman dekat tapi Pencolek, akhirnya gue repot-repot ngasih tau. Gak gampang lho, ngasih tau sesuatu yang berupa kritikan. Berjuta-juta jiwa tidak suka menerima kritikan. Teman gua menerimanya dengan baik dan mengerti, untuk sehari. Besoknya dia mulai mulai lagi.
Yah, kalau mau adilnya sih, gua gak bisa nyalahin kebiasaan orang, siapa tau orang ogah temenan sama gua gara-gara gue gak pernah nyolek, hehehe… tapi sebagai pembelaan diri, liat-liat dong kalo nyolek orang yang gak suka dicolek! Nyebelin tau..apalagi kalo cowok. Pengen jotos rasanya kalo udah intensity tinggi. Mungkin ini sama aja dengan orang2 yang gak suka ciri tertentu di orang laen..mungkin ada yang suka teman tukang kentut, tukang cabut2 bulu atau apapun juga…
Masalah pencolekan bukan satu2nya yang bikin gua jarang punya teman dekat pencolek. Sepertinya personalitinya berbeda atau mungkin memang tidak ada jodoh berteman. Gua juga punya teman pencolek dan tabah yang sudah mengenal dan siap gua kepret tiap kali dia lupa. Itu buat teman. Buat stranger yang baru kenal, akan ada ‘jarak aman’. Lagian ngapain sih nyolek2??? Emangnya kita sabun??
Monday, June 22, 2009
Sunday, June 07, 2009
Aquarama & Admiralty Park
This is it. The dread-est time of the year. It’s the peak of summer, June and July, where the winds stop blowing, no public off day, and no holiday seasons. These are the two months I dislike the most in a year.
So last Sunday we and our newly found photography kakis were going to the park nearby my house for macro photo shoot. There are seven of us now, the other three couldn’t go. The weather was harsh, we started melting even from home. It was one of the sunniest days and when we reached the park, it was at 11.30, mid of the day. Yah, we should have started earlier.
I was quite skeptical with the park, but apparently we could find a lot of macro stuff, I mean insects to shoot. So many that we already started shooting by the time we entered. For sunny area, we had to bear the heat and ended up all taned, it was a very significant tan for half a day work. We found area under the shade but it was full of mosquitoes. I don’t know what I prefer, shade under crazy sun or mosquito bites .. I think I enjoy shooting without mosquitos bites and the itch more. Except various insects, we saw birds and monkeys.
I’m still shaky, but uh-oh…after holding this camera, I don’t know how long I can sustain without sacrificing my money for the underwater casing. Oh.
It gets very hot and humid, when you reach the outdoor, it’s like entering a tunnel of warm air. Sometimes the rain helps; it doesn’t happen often enough, but this morning, it looks good. The sky is grey and the wind is there. Way to start a day, sleepy, but it beats hot air.
Except during holiday on the beach, I prefer cooler weather. I also like rainy weather when I’m in town, doing everyday thing although cloudy and windy is the best for city life. My favorite weather could be autumn, it must be nice to walk in the forest with all the orange leaves and cool wind.
So last Sunday we and our newly found photography kakis were going to the park nearby my house for macro photo shoot. There are seven of us now, the other three couldn’t go. The weather was harsh, we started melting even from home. It was one of the sunniest days and when we reached the park, it was at 11.30, mid of the day. Yah, we should have started earlier.
I was quite skeptical with the park, but apparently we could find a lot of macro stuff, I mean insects to shoot. So many that we already started shooting by the time we entered. For sunny area, we had to bear the heat and ended up all taned, it was a very significant tan for half a day work. We found area under the shade but it was full of mosquitoes. I don’t know what I prefer, shade under crazy sun or mosquito bites .. I think I enjoy shooting without mosquitos bites and the itch more. Except various insects, we saw birds and monkeys.
Two day before, Friday, I went to Aquarama (aquarium and pets) exhibition with my colleague. This is the first time I try my new camera for underwater subjects.
Sometimes my colleagues like to tease me about how easy it is to see marine life in aquarium without the hassle of going to the wild. Well, yes in aquarium I can see many type of marine lives I might have to spend days and trips just to catch them in the wild, like mandarin fish, harlequin shrimp. Or go to the deep in very specific location only to find purple fire goby. It sounds good but I wish I am not separated with them by the glass tank, I wish I don’t need to bend down to take the picture, bear the weight of the camera and feel the lack of water surround me and it’s so much fun to see how they ignore me in the wild instead of begging me for food. Can’t believe how much I miss going down the water again!
Sometimes my colleagues like to tease me about how easy it is to see marine life in aquarium without the hassle of going to the wild. Well, yes in aquarium I can see many type of marine lives I might have to spend days and trips just to catch them in the wild, like mandarin fish, harlequin shrimp. Or go to the deep in very specific location only to find purple fire goby. It sounds good but I wish I am not separated with them by the glass tank, I wish I don’t need to bend down to take the picture, bear the weight of the camera and feel the lack of water surround me and it’s so much fun to see how they ignore me in the wild instead of begging me for food. Can’t believe how much I miss going down the water again!
I’m still shaky, but uh-oh…after holding this camera, I don’t know how long I can sustain without sacrificing my money for the underwater casing. Oh.
Tuesday, June 02, 2009
Kindness and Regulation Freaks
Singapore is launching Social Kindness Movement Campaign. it tries to teach people to be gracious and kind towards others. Kindness Campaign, teaching kindness. As weird as it sounds, kindness might not be as obvious to modern society that has strong individualism.
Singapore might be one of the safests, but it’s also cold society. Small gestures and graciousness are sometimes received as alien code of communication, with inability to reply or appreciate. If you dip into cold pool, you’ll feel the cold and your body start to adjust, that’s what happen for many of us who have been staying too long here. We might not lose it, but there are so many situations that refrain us from practicing it. It’s second skin that we try to shake off but sometimes it sticks. Phew, seems like I’m all for metaphor this morning!
So, is it worthwhile to teach kindness? Well, I’m not sure whether it can be ‘taught’, but for what I know, little kindness and good gestures do make your day and make you fell good.
Kindness is not exactly the same with gentlemaness , it’s not even a word!!! But it's not that different. Beside kindness, Singapore seriously lack of gentlemanless. I can’t speak for other countries, again, I might be here too long to know.
To relate to gentlemaness, women are demanding and selfish creature. I don’t deny that. Not that I want to speak for all women, but we are like that at certain level. ‘Certain level’ is different for everyone.
One of the solid example about why I said that is the fact that women always demand equity in gender, but they also prefer the Adam counterpart to treat them better because they are, eh, we are women.
In fact, we like gentlemen. Who doesn’t? Even guy likes gentlemen. A sort of person who treat other people with dignity and respect, esp women. In our dictionary, it’s like the sort of person who respect and protective to their female companions.
Well, it feels nice when a guy is being attentive, for example, like even during a simple meal. Small things like pulling the seat, pouring the tea or taking far far away dishes for you are very nice gestures. It can be a rarity with modern society where equity of gender is more prominent than ever. That makes it more precious.
Supportng that, women hate ungentlemen bastards the most. Well, harshly put, it doesn’t mean someone who don’t do the gentlemen things, which make up the most of society, but more for someone who does the opposite. It’s totally fine nowadays that getlemanlism is dying or given exclusive to people with better appearance, but we hate it the most when a guy breaks every rules. Cutting the queue, fighting seat in public train with elderly, pregnant woman or woman in general, brushing and pushing people aside to get to their destination are taken more seriously if the offenders are men. Female offenders, we could just frown upon them ‘seen that’ attitude, but for male offender, the reaction is mostly ‘such a bastard’.
I would personally say that gender equity can never work in every things. Male and female are different gender, perceived in different way, that are many things that don’t work in female favor, and vice versa. Life is unfairly fair. This is just one of them.
That is why it’s such a pleasant experience that I have an impressive neighbor kid, well, not really neighbor, the kid lives in the same block. Certain time of the morning, I would see the same people in the elevator. And this kid would go out of the lift, presses the button and patiently waits for all passengers to alight. I though he did it because there was a mother pushing a pram, it took time for her to get out, but apparently he does it for everyone, whoever sharing a lift or even me alone. I think it’s a very nice gesture that has become quite a rarity here, too bad not half of the people bother to say thank you.
Well, it’s never too early or too late to adapt such a behavior, that honestly, make everyday life feels better. I can collect vividly how a friend of mine was cursing for half a day before a man let the door close on her face while she was carrying bulky thins. And good gesture or ‘gentlemen’ behaviors is not exclusive to man, but for woman too. Nothing physical can differentiate the way someone can or can not do good gestures, because it’s so diverse and can be practices in many ways, many situations and opportunities.
So, as cynical as I am, let’s be kind!
P.S: By the time I post this, I’m quite pissed and amazed of what the campaign has become.
Yah, it had raised some awareness, but it also wake up the dead of ‘regulation freaks’. I can almost find in newspaper daily call from public to suggest that government emphasize the rule with punishment or fine for ‘unkindness’, for example, those who don’t give seat to needy. Holly molly, don’t we have enough regulation?! What’s up when everything is being regulated like that, I’ll take it as “whatever is not punishable, then it’s okay to do society”. Is there a sense of common sense?? Even my dogs knew when they did wrong, they’d give me ‘that’ face, they don’t need regulation to realize.
Can’t understand these people. Huh. ??? Huh.
Anyway, these control freaks don’t recognize people not giving up seat might need it desperately too, that needy might not be visible, pregnancy is not watermelon look on your face. What about women with early pregnancies. What about people who are sick, how to define? Put a stamp in their forehead?
So, my opinion, next campaign.. let’s fine and punish regulation freaks! Geez.
.
Singapore might be one of the safests, but it’s also cold society. Small gestures and graciousness are sometimes received as alien code of communication, with inability to reply or appreciate. If you dip into cold pool, you’ll feel the cold and your body start to adjust, that’s what happen for many of us who have been staying too long here. We might not lose it, but there are so many situations that refrain us from practicing it. It’s second skin that we try to shake off but sometimes it sticks. Phew, seems like I’m all for metaphor this morning!
So, is it worthwhile to teach kindness? Well, I’m not sure whether it can be ‘taught’, but for what I know, little kindness and good gestures do make your day and make you fell good.
Kindness is not exactly the same with gentlemaness , it’s not even a word!!! But it's not that different. Beside kindness, Singapore seriously lack of gentlemanless. I can’t speak for other countries, again, I might be here too long to know.
To relate to gentlemaness, women are demanding and selfish creature. I don’t deny that. Not that I want to speak for all women, but we are like that at certain level. ‘Certain level’ is different for everyone.
One of the solid example about why I said that is the fact that women always demand equity in gender, but they also prefer the Adam counterpart to treat them better because they are, eh, we are women.
In fact, we like gentlemen. Who doesn’t? Even guy likes gentlemen. A sort of person who treat other people with dignity and respect, esp women. In our dictionary, it’s like the sort of person who respect and protective to their female companions.
Well, it feels nice when a guy is being attentive, for example, like even during a simple meal. Small things like pulling the seat, pouring the tea or taking far far away dishes for you are very nice gestures. It can be a rarity with modern society where equity of gender is more prominent than ever. That makes it more precious.
Supportng that, women hate ungentlemen bastards the most. Well, harshly put, it doesn’t mean someone who don’t do the gentlemen things, which make up the most of society, but more for someone who does the opposite. It’s totally fine nowadays that getlemanlism is dying or given exclusive to people with better appearance, but we hate it the most when a guy breaks every rules. Cutting the queue, fighting seat in public train with elderly, pregnant woman or woman in general, brushing and pushing people aside to get to their destination are taken more seriously if the offenders are men. Female offenders, we could just frown upon them ‘seen that’ attitude, but for male offender, the reaction is mostly ‘such a bastard’.
I would personally say that gender equity can never work in every things. Male and female are different gender, perceived in different way, that are many things that don’t work in female favor, and vice versa. Life is unfairly fair. This is just one of them.
That is why it’s such a pleasant experience that I have an impressive neighbor kid, well, not really neighbor, the kid lives in the same block. Certain time of the morning, I would see the same people in the elevator. And this kid would go out of the lift, presses the button and patiently waits for all passengers to alight. I though he did it because there was a mother pushing a pram, it took time for her to get out, but apparently he does it for everyone, whoever sharing a lift or even me alone. I think it’s a very nice gesture that has become quite a rarity here, too bad not half of the people bother to say thank you.
Well, it’s never too early or too late to adapt such a behavior, that honestly, make everyday life feels better. I can collect vividly how a friend of mine was cursing for half a day before a man let the door close on her face while she was carrying bulky thins. And good gesture or ‘gentlemen’ behaviors is not exclusive to man, but for woman too. Nothing physical can differentiate the way someone can or can not do good gestures, because it’s so diverse and can be practices in many ways, many situations and opportunities.
So, as cynical as I am, let’s be kind!
P.S: By the time I post this, I’m quite pissed and amazed of what the campaign has become.
Yah, it had raised some awareness, but it also wake up the dead of ‘regulation freaks’. I can almost find in newspaper daily call from public to suggest that government emphasize the rule with punishment or fine for ‘unkindness’, for example, those who don’t give seat to needy. Holly molly, don’t we have enough regulation?! What’s up when everything is being regulated like that, I’ll take it as “whatever is not punishable, then it’s okay to do society”. Is there a sense of common sense?? Even my dogs knew when they did wrong, they’d give me ‘that’ face, they don’t need regulation to realize.
Can’t understand these people. Huh. ??? Huh.
Anyway, these control freaks don’t recognize people not giving up seat might need it desperately too, that needy might not be visible, pregnancy is not watermelon look on your face. What about women with early pregnancies. What about people who are sick, how to define? Put a stamp in their forehead?
So, my opinion, next campaign.. let’s fine and punish regulation freaks! Geez.
.
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