Along the century, since the time of Dinasty Chong Ching Chang, men always complain that they don’t understand woman.
They don’t understand why ‘I’m OK’ means the opposite, why whatever their size they would ask ‘Am I fat?’, why every men should have a little bit of mind reading psychic instead of perfectly working ear etc etc etc…
To put aside all the –sometimes- unfair accusation, personally, I also find men are also difficult to understand. Some say, they say, reading a man’s mind is like reading a book, loud and clear, OK means OK, promise means promise, deer means deer, fat means fat. Lucky, most of the men I know are inside that category, but some are fall outside the space into the black hole and they never fail to amuse me – mostly in negative way.
Nobody needs to jump into self-defense here, if you disagree, just think that you fall into the better category. Sometimes when a group of male friends do some ladies bashing, maybe about girlfriend, typical women, bla blah blah, after all the awful gender accusation, when I protest, they only need to say, Not you, you are in another category. Then I don’t have much to say, what can I say? It’s better to accept that I’m not what they are talking about or if I talk more, I’d fall into one of the accusation, cerewet. Anyway, I am easy to please. : )
But, but when I also try to defend others, like I said many of my friends don’t do that either ..etc, they’d say either you are a group of rare breed or you are alien in disguise. Ah.
So, these are my accusations that men are not as cool as they think, other than Hubby of course, hehehe…, but this is limited to my..ops..29 years experience, enough lah!
1. Same as woman, man gossips.
Some men, when they feel comfortable, do talk about other people. Their favorite topic is surprise, surprise, other men. They are picky about men that doesn’t belong to their category (such as what woman do), manly men (or so they think) would pick on girly man, Casanova or men with attitude.
Beside that, they can gossip about other things too, like people’s behavior in public, unpleasant colleagues just like women, so they are human.
The difference is, if you gossiped with a woman, you can see that she would try to add in some fuel to the fire, or spice to the food, so if you gossip or complain to a woman, you’d get additional help.
If you gossiped with a man, they would give the same examples or experiences but they hardly help you cook.
The pro, gossiping with a woman will reduce your guilt if you despising someone, because they make you feel you are really right by supporting you. Gossiping with a man will make you feel that the situation is not as bad as you think.
2. What they like, and what they don’t like, sometimes men can be very confusing. Like woman, they have mood swing. You can see a woman happy and cheery but when something happen, she would be the most unpleasant creature on earth; it can be a matter of seconds. I know at least I’m capable of that. Two days ago, I was happy and smiley and ready to give teddy bear to anyone, then my computer refused to do what it supposes to do. Once, twice, and the forth time I’m ready to throw it away – to someone – whoever that pass my table and be friendly.
Or when PMS struck, everything is wrong, everyone is ugly, every kid is deserve to be in cage, nothing is funny and life is suck. But when the culprit finally arrives, Hey, beautiful weather, what a cute kid with their tiny shoes etc etc.
# Maybe we are Hulk #.
Eits, men are the same. But maybe, not so obvious. I found that something that doesn’t offend them one time, can offend them another time, so it’s quite difficult to guess what is ok and not ok sometimes. I just offended a friend yesterday, by saying what was popping to my mind without thinking. To my surprise it offended him and it made me feel very bad. But the good thing is, for most of the man, they are very very good in forgive and forget, one thing that women never able to compete. So when I expressed my regret, he was accepting it warmly, not only that but he could also look back and blamed his own mood. This is one of the things that makes me feel that become a friend to men are much more easy. It can be, very, very tiring to be friend with female when one mistake can destroy the friendship easily. Lucky, most of my female friends have enough testosterone level to balance and become great ones.
3. If women are sensitive, sometimes too sensitive, some men can be *******ly sensitive.
At least I have two colleagues who can be my pain in the ass. I don’t even know when or how I offended them in the past, it seems like they are scared of me and take extra effort and precaution when talking to me and after what they need to do with me is done, they run away. When I tried to think back about the things I might have done, I can’t find anything except I was being honest or maybe, I talked in a bit rush manner (I was in the rush) so I didn’t really pay attention to what they asked. But FGS, the question that the asked was a yes or no question, what was I suppose to do, write a story to answer it? Or give a huge smile and asking how their day while my computer is crashing? It’s ridiculous. I can't even think of a woman who would feel offended by something like that.
Amppuuuun. Ampuuuun. Ampuuuun. I’m really really scared with this breed of man.
4. If women can be whiny. Have you ever met whiny man?
I had one colleague like that, and although sometimes he could be quite entertaining, some other time all I wanted is to scream and pushed his head to the wall, Shut Upppp Shut Upppp Shut UPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!. Dogol.
One of the examples to this kind is Jerry Seinfeld character, he is SO whiny!
Maybe most women, including me, are still traditional and like to think that men are suppose to be someone to lean on when things go the wrong way. We still hope that they are the rational ones and handle thing with hands rather than mouth.
Allow us to have that mouth part, please. :D
5. If cerewet is associated with women only,...
I might consider marching in the street.
I have three male colleagues who fall in this category (I start to think, why I can find all male samples in my office alone?).
One is a fun type of cerewet. He likes to visit everyone and could talk at least half an hour. He could talk about anything, from discount shops in Hongkong to why doggy like to lick their thing.
Two is a cerewet preacher. A good preacher is the one who knows how to make fun and criticize of his/herself too or his own beliefs and never look down on other's. But good preacher is very very rare, let’s say from ten over years I attend church, I’m impressed with two, TWO preachers only. Seminaries are different kind of preachers, many of them have charm and interesting, but when they start to promote something, that’s the end of it.
Okay, just like women, men can preach about anything. If aunties are highly avoided in family occasions, so do uncles.
My colleague in this type wanted to give me a private one-to-one church to save me from burning in hell when I happened to say, in between lunch meal, that I’m not a very devoted Christian from Every-Sunday-go-to-Church department. Lucky I was able to spot this type very well and ran like (hell).
The third type is the talkative one, whether anybody interested or not. Whether you body language rejects him or not, or even go away hand sign, as long as he can see you, he talks. If one is unlucky enough to say no, like yesterday, I saw my other colleague had to endure his ears while this breed talked for hours while he only said Uh Ah Hah with Kill Me Please look, until, finally, big boss came in and for the first time, she was a savior.
So, for all the men in the world. The remark that all men are heartless, can’t be trust, gatelan, cheater (ask broken-hearted women please) is enough.
Don’t take our women-associated negative expertise away please. ;p
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Age and wedlock lames man and beast.
- William Camden
All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That is his.
- Oscar Wilde
I’m not denying that women are foolish : God Almighty made them to match the men.
- George Eliot, Mary Ann Evans
To be wise and love. Exceeds man’s might.
- William Shakespeare
You asked me if I knew woman. Well, one of the thing I do not know about them is what they talk about while the men are talking. I must find out sometime.
- Edward Franklin Albee
You have to be very fond of men. Very, very fond. You have to be fond of them to love them. Otherwise they’re simply unbearable.
- Marguerite Duras
Some ladies smoke too much and some ladies drink too much and some ladies pray too much. But all ladies think that they weigh too much.
- Ogden Nash
One of the things being in politics has taught me is that men are not a reasoned or reasonable sex.
- Margaret Hilda Thatcher
A man who moralizes is usually a hypocrite and a woman who moralizes is invariably plain.
- Oscar Wilde
